Making It Work

I imagine finding a balance between work and family is hard for men. I hear lots of women talk about how their husbands work too much, are hardly ever home, and even when they are, their mind is still at work.
I think for wives of ministers, there is another element to that struggle. I don't feel good about complaining that Bobby has been putting in long hours, because I know that what he is doing is changing lives. (And that's not to say other careers don't change lives, actually, I think most of this applies to any marriage.)
I have to honestly say that this has never really been a struggle for Bobby and me. And believe me, Bobby is a busy guy! He puts in long hours that turn into long days, that become long weeks.... You get the picture. I think we have done a few things to help with the whole balance struggle and I thought I would share them with you.
1. Ministry is our life. It just always has been. And we have been fortunate enough that our talents and gifts are very complimentary. When we began having kids, though, we had to be creative. Now that we have four kids, I am not as hands on in his ministry as I once was. But I still feel super connected. Instead of serving on the worship team every week, I serve once a month. That was a hard transition! But we have found other ways for me to be involved. We host meetings at our house. That way, I get to attend and I get the connect with all the volunteers he works with. Practical things like that.
2. Our kids are involved in our ministries. (Well they are all under 7, so as much as they can be, they are involved!) We have each taken the older two with us on home communion trips and even hospital calls when it is appropriate. I just don't think they are ever to young to learn that ministry or serving isn't just something we do, it is who we are. I'm hoping this will do a couple things. I want my kids to grow up thinking they are so blessed to have a daddy that gets paid to serve God! And I want them to grow up always thinking of ways they can serve too.
3. But really, I think this is what makes it work the most for Bobby and me: Bobby would leave this ministry in a second if he thought our family would be better, our marriage would be better; and I would never ask. Understand, our idea of "better" has to do with being more like Christ and closer to God. Not just spending more time with each other and having a more consistent schedule.
I know this is a bit cyclical, but part of the reason he would do it in a second is because he knows I would never ask. And part of the reason I would never ask is because I know he would do it in a second.
Bobby and I share a mutual respect and love of the ministry. We share a mutual respect and love for each other. This is not only what makes it possible for us to do the work we do, but it's what makes it absolutely enjoyable! I couldn't imagine our life any other way.